I miss my mother-in-law… especially on the Fourth of July.
When she passed away last year, she was well into her 90s. She did not lead an easy life, but she decided to lead a happy one. In her youth, she worked with her family as a farm laborer following the different harvest seasons. At 17, she married my father-in-law, who was 19. They had 9 children together, 8 of whom lived till adulthood. She loved her husband, her children, their children, and so on.
She and her son, who lived with her on the family farm, started hosting Fourth of July parties as a chance to get the huge family together between Christmases. They were traditional “Fourths” with yard games, gunny sack races, grilled food, bed races, and lots of fireworks. When the hosting became too much for her, my daughter took over grandma’s workload at the party moved to her home. She kept all the same traditions and added some lake fun made possible by the new location. Although she didn’t host any more, my mother-in-law was still certainly the Grand Marshall of the event. She was always in the middle of it all.
Except for the fireworks.
During the fireworks, she quietly sat inside and watched out the windows, where the noise was buffered. I sat beside her. It was often the only time of the year she and I would be alone. Sometimes she held my hand.
I don’t think we will have a big get-together this year. With her passing, it looks like everyone will begin to break into their own family groups with the next generation as the elders. Everyone will adjust, as is normal and right.
How fortunate I am. I had my own original family, the family my husband and I made (with God’s love), and my husband's large Irish mob with a lovely matriarch as family.
I pray that each child at Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch will one day have a family they will reflect on with warmth. So far, they’ve had much harder lives than anyone should. Your support and care make a new future possible for each of them.
I hope someday they sit quietly, watching, enjoying family, knowing they are loved.
Please keep the children and staff of Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch in your prayers.
In His love,
Joy Ryan, President/CEO
Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch
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