In an article about unsung heroes, I read about a woman named Caitlin Shetterly. She was early in her first pregnancy and was taking a flight from the West Coast to Maine. It wasn’t too long after the horrors of 911, and she was a nervous flyer. As they got ready for takeoff, she turned to the passenger sitting next to her and asked, “Do you ever get nervous?”
He said he didn’t. Then, he said something Caitlin says she carries with her since that day… and shares with her children.
He said, “Most people are good.”
I think we all need to be reminded of that. I know I do. The news harangues us each day with stories of the evils of the world. Here at Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch, I read the backgrounds of the children we care for, and it is often hard to find the “good people” in what they’ve endured. The people who have hurt them, (although I know that “hurting people hurt people”), are hard to call “good.” I can feel compassion for them, but it takes work to be good, and those folks haven’t done the work.
Then I remember to lift my chin and look around. I open my ears and listen.
Outside my office door, in a nook next to the campus chapel, are two Ranch Residential Treatment Specialists, one of our residents, and Sydney the therapy dog. I hear giggling, then discussions about math, then quiet, then the sound of Sydney's ball as they throw it down the hallway.
The resident, a young boy, is receiving independent mentoring and support during the school day. Right now, he doesn’t do well with peers. His “go-to” approach is bullying and picking fights. That is how he has survived, as he couldn't navigate his world if he were weak or kind. With adults, he does pretty well. Teaching him to be that way with kids his own age is important to his treatment. I listened as the specialists re-directed his language, and said things like, “When you are in the classroom...,” and “How would you like to respond when 'x' happens?" They were relaxed and at ease—and so kind. They are preparing him to be slowly reintroduced among his peers. He wants to be there, but he needs to learn how. These really good people are helping him learn.
And, he will.
I heard a quote from Mark Twain recently and have been using it anywhere I can. “Kindness is the language that the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”
Good people speak the language of kindness.
Please keep the children and staff of Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch in your prayers.
His love,
Joy Ryan, President/CEO
Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch
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